This never gets old

by VAL CLIFTON

My sister doesn’t do media. She doesn’t watch the news. She has two heavy loads to worry about in her life right now: school work, and diapers. (Her child’s, of course).

But she has no excuse in the particular conversation, as she had yet to spawn and was only worrying about simple tasks such as chewing and making sure she didn’t trip over her flipper-like feet when she walked.

Anyway, using this knowledge to my benefit, I decided I would see how far I could take a conversation with her. And promptly after, I posted the bulletin all over MySpace.

The lovely asterisks indicate language which is far too cultured to share with a mixed audience.

I’m ‘CHECK YO SELF FOOL!’ my sister is, well, ’~rACHEL.’

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

So.

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

Did you hear about Pluto?

~rAcHeL~ says:

what is that all about?

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

Herro?

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

Huh?

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

WT* ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

What is what all about?

~rAcHeL~ says:

pluto

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

I swear, somebody must have replaced my sister with a typing chimp, cuz the heiffer just ain’t making sense today.

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

NASA put out a press release today that they plan to blow up Pluto because they believe that it directly impacts the green house effect.

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

And then there were 8!

~rAcHeL~ says:

what?

~rAcHeL~ says:

can they do that?

~rAcHeL~ says:

?

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

They can and they will.  They are sending a crew of 6 to man the spaceshuttle carrying the explosive devices.  It takes off in a day or two.

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

So if it looks cloudy outside they said it’s debris from the explosion.

~rAcHeL~ says:

are you f***ing kidding me?

~rAcHeL~ says:

thats f***ing crazy 

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

Yeah.

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

Especially since I made it all up.,

~rAcHeL~ says:

you f***** b****

~rAcHeL~ says:

i don’t watch tv or read the newspaper, a******

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLLOLLOL

~rAcHeL~ says:

are you bored?

 

~rAcHeL~ says: 

b*****

~rAcHeL~ says:

w****

~rAcHeL~ says:

s****

~rAcHeL~ says:

s***

~rAcHeL~ says:

t*****

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

No, but seriously

~rAcHeL~ says:

h******

~rAcHeL~ says:

f****

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

Pluto has been demoted.  It’s not considered a Planet anymore.

~rAcHeL~ says:

i don’t believe you

~rAcHeL~ says:

tell me nuthin

CHECK YO SELF FOOL! says:

ask Mama.

~rAcHeL~ says:

i will.